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“[The people who broke us] taught you to appreciate what you have because in a blink of an eye, everything you love could be gone. They taught you selflessness because you don’t just let someone you love walk out of your life without knowing that maybe it’s a better for them to be without you. They taught you passion and how to fight for what’s in your heart. They made you feel and in a world where it’s better to be detached than hurt, we seldom allow ourselves to feel anything at all.”

Milliza Malabanan,

We Should Thank The People Who Broke Us | Thought Catalog

2. You had to learn to think differently.

Whether how to calculate your income taxes for a freelance project, or how to stop feeling jealous, or how to love after loss, or why you take the political stance you do, you were challenged to change your inner narrative this year, and you did.

6. You lost love.

You never actually lose love in your life, but it’s common to lose a person who you assume will bring you the feeling of love. This serves an incredible purpose – to show you that love is never gone, you had just misplaced its source. It always and only comes from you and what you think about the people and circumstances you experience. To “lose love” is just to dissolve yet another idea that it would come from anywhere but within.

8. You learned how to respond to your life in ways you never knew before.

The word “responsibility” breaks down to “able to respond,” if you think about it, and there’s a very important reason why we associate adulthood with it. The reality is that to live a happy and healthy and fulfilling life, you must be able to respond to it, and take action where need-be. It’s in our inaction that we suffer (even if “taking action” is just learning to let go!) In a truly successful year, you learned how to respond in ways you never had to before, and built your confidence and self-trust in seeing that you could, in fact, take care of yourself.

Brianna Wiest,

12 Signs You Accomplished More Than You Think You Did This Year | Thought Catalog

“In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take and the decisions we waited too long to make.”

Lewis Carroll

“You,

of course.

Always you.”

Clementine von Radics,

What Brings Me Joy

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#307: 10 Things I Learnt in 2015

1. I learn something new every day.

2. Don’t judge a book by its cover, especially people working in the service and F&B industries. Discard the perception that people working in the service and F&B sectors “can’t study”/”have no future”/”are of lower social standing”. Times have changed; some go into culinary arts because they have a genuine passion for it. Also, even college and university students work part-time in retail and F&B to earn some extra cash.

3. There is no shame in what job you hold if you are earning an honest living. There’s this stigma regarding people working in the service line, F&B, as cleaners, construction workers, etc. After working my first part time job earlier this year, I now understand better what service and F&B staff go through on a daily basis. Their jobs are tough, involving long hours and requiring patience, tolerance, and humility. This translates to my newfound respect for cleaners, construction workers, and the like. They do the jobs that we “educated people” strive to avoid in future, but those roles still have to be filled someone, and I’m thankful and applaud everyone working in these sectors; young or old, local or foreign, regardless of background or history. The jobs they hold are just as honourable, if not more honourable, than white and perhaps, even blue-collar jobs.

4. Take/create more carefully, purposefully thought out photos. Don’t just point and shoot, or throw on layers upon layers of filters, airbrushes, and fades. Make art.

5. Being alone/spending alone time is perfectly fine. No shame in doing things by yourself. It can be liberating in fact, the freedom to do whatever you want, go wherever you want. You may also look at things with a slightly different perspective as well.

6. Be more open-minded. Make new friends, laugh at your own silliness, entertain and respect other opinions and perspectives, don’t be rudely surprised if things happen in outcomes that deviate from your schema and scripts.

7. Don’t be afraid to confide in people you’ve been friends for some time. And likewise, do the same for those people. Because, there are some things we just can’t keep to ourselves, some things we just have to talk about it with others. Get it out of our system, share the burden, support one another.

8. Invest in clothes, shoes, accessories – fashion in general – that allow you to mix-and-match with what you already have, that adds to your existing wardrobe.

9. Acknowledgement, acceptance, moving on. Sometimes, good things come to an end. We may have no control over their unravelling. We may have regrets that if we did this or that, or didn’t do this or that, things might have turned out differently. As arduous as it may be, we try our best to come to terms with it, to learn from it. It hurts, it hurts like hell. We may try and try and just fall apart when it gets too much. Then we let the dust settle, and start again. We just keep repeating this healing and falling apart until we’re okay. Specifically relationship-wise, it doesn’t mean that we don’t care about them, nor stop loving them. We still do, we still care about them very much, we still love them, we can still hope. Just with this in mind: to be fair to them and to ourselves, we gotta be what they need us to be, and we gotta be the kind of person we need to be for ourselves.

10. Be thankful and contented. Often, we get too caught up chasing after more and more that we forget what we already have, what we take for granted. In a world and time when it seems hard to feel genuine satisfaction, counting our blessings and being grateful for what we already have helps us be more at peace with ourselves. Being at peace with ourselves, is seriously underrated.

So please ask yourself: ‘What would I do if I weren’t afraid?’ And then go do it.” Into 2016 we go.

#307: 10 Things I Learnt in 2015