#243: a second chance

I never thought I’d face a situation like this in my life. I was on the bring of losing the only other human being who loves me the most other than my parents. The root of this disappointing affair, stemmed from a problem I knew I had for a long time now, but I did nothing about it. I didn’t consider how she would feel as I let my demons win again and again until 2 days ago, she finally snapped, and rightfully so.

As vague as it seemed, I did cheatI did betray her. As she told me of how her other male friends who had their own partners behaved, I went from embarrassed to utterly ashamed. I couldn’t look at her, much less deserve to even touch her. She even came as close to relenting that I should leave now before I cause her anymore heartbreak.

I felt defeated.

I have been selfish, self-centered and ungrateful. I asked her to give me a second chance, and her reply?

For what“.

Those 2 curt words shut down my emotions. I should have fought harder on my part, to face up to my problem and to work at overcoming it. It almost cost me my relationship with a girl whose heart few can rival.

But, she gave me a second chance.

Here is my final chance, to fight harder, to face up to my problem and to work at overcoming it. It is something that can be given up for and should be given up for my relationship with her, and that’s what I am going to do from now on.

I promise not to hurt her like this anymore, I can’t. And, I’ve never been more ashamed of myself than I did over the past 2 days.

#243: a second chance

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