#44: better in words than spoken somehow

(C) http://www.angeluspress.org/oscatalog/item/8328/christmas-cards-star-over-bethlehem

It took an instant to turn things from smooth sailing into a crumbling facade. As much as i tried so hard to prevent the unfavourable outcomes from taking place, they still happened nonetheless.  All i wanted, was to understand what went wrong, what i had done wrong, confess, apologise & mend the situations. But…

I was powerless against them.

I can only watch & see, something, 1 thing or another, deteriorate & eventually reach a point i simply don’t know how to salvage the situation (even though i want to, so much).

I still am powerless against them.

Everything i fail to achieve, i pray that God will make up for me. Everything, i just can’t seem to make right. This ‘everything’, i pray that God will help me mend.

There’s nothing much i can do now, unless if others call for me, or if God signals to me to do something. I can only let God work things out for me. Sounds lazy i know, but i don’t know what else can i do.

It’s hard to have faith now at a time like this, very hard. But still, it’s something I have to try.

Have a little faith.

*Christmas hasn’t been fantastic this year, but i thank God for the cards of sincere messages, chocolates to keep me company when i’m down, cake & cookies i can’t bear to eat & the people, who care enough to make those for me, to add some cheer to my better-off-forgotten Christmas 2010*

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#44: better in words than spoken somehow

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